When you lose someone special in your life, people act like they can relate to you. They say things that think you’d want to hear. They tell you that your loved one wouldn’t you to feel like that or how things will get better. They tell you how you “should” feel or how you “should” react.
People can sit there as much as they want and tell you these things and maybe they mean good, but it doesn’t help. These people will not understand the horrible pain that you feel until they themselves have been in your shoes and have lost their father, mother, etc.
Sure maybe these people in your life mean well, but sometimes you just want to tell them to shut up. When things like this happen in your life, this is when you ultimately realize who the true people are in your life. You realize who your true friends are. Which one of your friends would drop everything to be by your side at 3am when you’re crying? Which friend will pick you up off the floor after a night of drinking because you had to escape the horrible thoughts in your head and the pain in your heart?
In 2006 I lost my mom and it was the most horrible experience in my life. To sit there helpless, waiting what seemed like an eternity for the paramedics to arrive. Watching my mother die before my eyes and praying to God to not take her – that it just wasn’t her time. The tears streaming down my eyes as the paramedics tried to resuscitate her in front of my eyes, then finally rushing her to the hospital. Only to get to the hospital and be taken to that room and hearing your worst nightmare come true.
What has prompted me to write all this? A good friend of mine recently experienced a loss of someone in her life. I would post her link, but I don’t know if she would want me to broadcast her situation to the world. It just has made me think so much lately of how people try to treat you after you lose a loved one.
My words of advice…. If you don’t know how to deal with the situation at hand and you are a friend of someone who has lost a loved one, please don’t sit there and say that you “understand.” You will never “understand” until you’ve walked in that persons shoes or lost a very close loved one. You just need to be there to support them and listen to them. Don’t judge. Just be there.
This is just more of an informative type blog post. Not all Top Secret blog posts will have the same passwords. Some will be very private and only a few, and I do mean a select few, will get the password. If I don’t give you the password, please don’t take offense, it’s not personal. I probably just feel that you would judge me on what I wrote or not agree with my view. Thanks!
Only two more days until the weekend! I am so tired and stressed out this week that I just can’t wait until the weekend is here for my mind to vegetate. Oh wait, that probably won’t happen though, since I have to work on my financial statements for my Managerial Accounting class. It is fun stuff, I kid you not!
I’m also in the process of trying to get our house in some semblance of order. I am still trying to organize closets, put stuff away, and all that other fun stuff that everyone knows I adore so very much. I wish I had the desire to clean and organize all day long – to be one of those orderly people. Maybe someday I’ll develop that skill.
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I’ve decided that I am going to start to do password protected entries, like Mrs. Black Banana. That way I can be more open about what I write and not have to censor myself as much. If you would like the password, please comment here. Thanks.
Just for Mrs. Black Banana, I will continue on talking about my love of cheese. I never realized how great cheese is! I seriously eat it on a daily basis and savor every moment as it is in m mouth. Top Foods and Costco have a very nice selection of cheese. I found a three pack of Boursin at Costco for around $8 and LeRule for about $6.
My cheese of the moment is this delightful Boxing Cheddar that is aged 3 years. I bought it over the weekend at Top Foods. I think it was cheese of the month, because they were giving out free samples. Of course, how could I deny myself a free sample of a cheese? I quickly picked up a sample and tasted it. Truly, it was love at first bite. Smooth, crumbly, and yum! It only costs $6.99 a pound. That’s a steal in the cheese world!
Another really great cheese is Cotswold. Top Foods also carries this cheese, as well as Albertsons. It is an English cheese with chives and chopped onions. It is a great cheese to pair with crackers or eat as a snack. Highly recommended!
In closing, I found a great web site called ILoveCheese.Com. This site is so awesome! It has all sorts of recipes that deal with cheese, as well as a list of places that make cheeses in the United States. There is also a great cheese guide. Check it out!
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0 days until our two year wedding anniversary! I ♥ him.
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